This was a common pattern:
```
query = author.posts.select(:title)
connection.select_one(query)
```

However `.select` returns a ActiveRecord::AssociationRelation, which has
the bind information, so we can use that to get the right sql query.

Also fix select_rows on postgress and sqlite3 that were not using the binds

[fixes #7538]
[fixes #12017]
[related #13731]
[related #12056]