[NewIR]Add NOT_FOR_INFER to prune Inference Library Size and Split VJP CodeGen into pd_op_vjp.cc (#56352)

* [NewIR]Prune Inference Library Size and Remove IR Dialect

* remove options

* add NOT_FOR_INFER

* fix pd_vjp.cc

* polish deps

* fix code style

* fix unittest

* fix cmake

* fix inference CI