cherry-pick1.6 simplify master+patch，remove ins when size != merge_size or has conflict slot  (#20941)

* simplify master+patch，remove ins when size != merge_size or has conflict slot
* test=develop

* add check nan / inf in downpour worker during training
* test=develop

* update pserver decay blocks

* update distributed notify handler

[cherry-pick] keep the size of symmetric padding is 2 for 2d and 3 for 3d. test=release/1.6 (#20903) (#20939)

* Fix Paddle Cloud role maker (#20860)

- fix jit::matmul bug 

input x, shape(m, k), weight, shape(k, n) 

* bug fix, test=develop

* Simplify third_party path in Python package
* Fix typo

[cherry-pick] fix the bug of conv_transpose: compitable with AnyLayout setting, test=release/1.6 #(20897) (#20918)

Bug Fix: Paddle-TRT cannot handle adaptive pooling in pool2d op converter and "num" attribute in split op converter (#20733) (#20902)

* fix pool2d trt converter, test=develop

* add fix for split op converter, test=develop

* add support to gcc8, add docker env
* remove the warning issue

* Serialize to pickle format (#20820)

test=develop

* save load problem fix and new feature add (#20823)

* fix persistable;

* fix save load bugs; test=develop

* fix bug; test=develop

* add example for new io api; test=develop

* addd example; test=develop

* Add IndicateVarDataType interface to block tensor is not initialized problem in OP GetExceptedKernelType (#20044)

* add indicate_var_data_type inferface, test=develop

* add unittests & polish error message, test=develop

* remove needless include, test=develop

* extract public function & polish message, test=develop

* delete empty var check, test=develop

* change data_type to pointer parameter, test=develop

* polish details, test=develop

* Replace risky GetInputType method with secure IndicateVarDataType interface (#20668)

* replace part of the old implementation, test=develop

* restore concat op, test=develop

* update all ops implemention & delete GetDataTypeOfVar func, test=develop

test=release/1.6

* test=document_fix

* test=release/1.6

* add more err msg, test=develop

* add more unittests, test=release/1.6

test=release/1.6 test=document_fix

test=develop

* add support for __get_item__ of Variable test=develop

* update the infer shape of matmul,  test=release/1.6

* add unittests of matmul, test=release/1.6

* change func names, test=release/1.6

* add dlpack include in third_party. test=develop

* test=develop, communicator_is_sgd_optimizer flags

test=release/1.6

【cherry-pick】 fix fill_constant shape with -1 and enhance cross_entropy test=release/1.6 (#20722) (#20728)